A Year Ago Today: I Chose Peace Over a Paycheck, Electrocuted My Nervous System & Accidentally Rewired My Brain
And yet..it's one of the best decisions I've ever made
April 1, 2025, I woke confused. I was supposed to feel nervous, terrified, anxious … but all I felt was peace on this Tuesday morning.
I was going to quit my job today – no backup plan.
I didn’t know what was next, I just knew everything in me was screaming, “if you don’t get out now … this will be it.”
This wasn’t a rash decision. It’s not like I woke up that morning for the first time thinking of quitting and impulsively acting on it. It had been building for a while. But I didn’t know it was going to be that week until the Friday before, and I didn’t know I’d have the guts to do it until 12:31 pm that day when I left a Webex call with my then-boss.
Who I Was Leading Up to That Day
The new hire who walked into a tall building on Madison Ave, ready to work the long hours because I believed hard work was enough.
The associate who would wake up at 6 am, commute for 1.5 hr into the city, work 14-hour days, commute home, crash in bed by 11 pm, and do it all over again.
The girl in her 20s who would skip out on happy hours and decline invites to social events, because I truly believed in “grind now, play later”.
The experienced hire who had a wake-up call that hard work would never be enough, and in the corporate world, you were either in the ‘club’ or part of the maintenance crew staffed to keep it running.
The manager, who a week before a filing deadline woke up with the flu – I’m talking voice loss, fever, chills, headaches, nausea, etc. And yet, still joined calls, reviewed workpapers, and kept my cell phone on my pillow because the level of guilt I felt was unbearable. Which is laughable because while I felt like I was on death’s door, I was getting text messages from someone on my leadership team asking if I really had the flu because they were sitting at my desk and had a baby at home. And like the good lil worker I was – I responded to reassure her I Clorox-wiped everything. They did later apologize for sending insensitive texts, so that counts for something, right?
The woman who realized this environment was not for me, and after almost 8 years, left in hopes of work-life balance … or at the very least get my weekends back. So two weeks before the COVID shutdown took the world by storm, I accepted another job, said goodbye to a chapter, and enjoyed two weeks of funemployment preparing for my next.
Fast forward 5 years later …
On the day of pranks, I was getting ready to do it again. Only this time, it wasn’t funemployment – I had no idea what was going to happen next. I only knew in the immediate future what I would certainly feel:
Relief.
And it was blissful. I can close my eyes and still feel the unmistakable calm that settled in my chest when I hit send on that resignation email.
And then came the part that fried my circuits
Some lessons I expected to learn, others knocked me on my back (not ass… flat on my back). So if you’re in that place today where you are looking for relief, and you’ve made up your mind it’s time to go, here are words of ‘wisdom’:
1. Don’t let anyone “f*** with your money”. So plan. Don’t leave until you have all your bases covered. Savings. Income. Healthcare (for my fellow US folks).
2. Before you go, make a plan for fun. My ONE regret was not booking a one-month break in Europe. I wanted to rent an Airbnb in Paris, use it as my base, and travel around Europe. I didn’t plan it before I turned my laptop in. Turns out it’s hard to spend money you have when you’ve got no income. Go figure, right?
3. Work is not your only problem. It’s just the loudest one at the moment. So best believe once you get rid of it. All the other things you’ve ignored or suppressed will pop like “great. Now that you’ve got the time …let’s deal with this” – Health? Relationships? A random email from your state tax office saying you owe them money from 2023? Yeahhh. That was a fun one to get.
4. This one is my favorite: The self-trust you develop is unmatched. I won’t lie to you, it was shaky for a minute. I had days I cried, questioning why I did this to myself. Days I felt defeat. I knew I couldn’t stay, but I was so frustrated that my choice was to sit in the bullsh*t or jump into this unknown world that challenged everything I believed about stability. All I had to hold onto was my faith. I had to trust that I recognized God’s voice and would make decisions with the best intentions.
I won’t lie, friend. If you’re like me and you borderline worship financial stability, wrap your identity in independence, and are a slave to what looks good on paper?
A decision like this will jolt you, electrocute your nervous system and rewire your brain.
But that can be a good thing.
We’re limited by our perspectives. The only way to expand them is to let go of what we know. Sounds “woo woo” but it’s the truth.
The part where I start again
This is not the typical success story you’ll read. The ones where people wait until they have a really good, encouraging update, and share their stories. I’m not knocking them - I love reading those. But my goal is to share my story from the mess – it’s the best place to share while the memories are fresh and the consequences of my actions are still unfolding.
Today, I’m figuring out my next. I took another job in corporate and learning to navigate the space from a new perspective. It’s wild to be back in an environment you left as a new person. Like I’ve said before, it’s like being awake while everyone around you is sleepwalking.
If You’re Standing Where I Stood…
A year ago, I didn’t know how things would play out.
I didn’t know how to trust myself.
I didn’t know how to listen to my body without feeling dramatic.
If you can relate. If you’re in that in‑between - tired, done, but terrified of what comes next, let’s chat.
No pressure.
No performance.
Just clarity, strategy, and a soft place to land.
(I’ll hold your hand while you figure out your next.)
And if you have a friend standing where I stood last year, share this with her. I wish I had someone just a few steps ahead to make the whole thing feel less terrifying.